I know that Rob thought I would freak out when it came to getting the epidural, because I am usually TERRIFIED of needles, but I didn't. I was in so much pain at that point that I just didn't give a flying flip. I sat on the edge of the bed and hunched over, my head on Rob's chest. It didn't hurt at all (relative, I guess), just felt a weird twinging.
Almost immediately, the pain stopped. I sat up in bed, and caught up on my texting. About 20-30 minutes later guess who arrived at the hospital? My midwife! And I was ready to push! I felt really bad because she had just come back from being out of town for her father-in-law's funeral. But I was so very happy and relieved she was going to deliver me.
She sat at the foot of the bed, and I sat in a reclining position with Rob holding one leg against my chest and the nurse holding the other. We all chatted and every few minutes I would push. It was so surreal. He was coming out with his hand in front of his face and over his head. My midwife kept trying to get him to pull his hand back in but he wasn't having any of it! Even now he loves his hands in his face. Rob says he is going to be a fighter. He is NOT.
I got to put my hand down there and feel his head when he was crowning. And when his torso and arms were out, I reached down, hooked my hands under his arms and pulled him out and onto my chest!!! He was PERFECT! He had dark hair, dimples, 10 fingers, 10 toes... His APGAR was an 8. When his cord stopped pulsing, Rob got to cut it. 10 minutes after delivering, my placenta just slid out and my midwife showed it to me. It looked like a cream balloon with a liver attached to the bottom, pretty gross.
It was just the most awesome feeling having my baby on my chest, so overwhelming and surreal. He was Mine! And I loved him so much! I remember as soon as I pulled him onto my chest, I just starting sobbing, it was too much awesome to take in. Also, I didn't tear enough for stitches, because my midwife was so wonderful!!!
It was really great, because I got to keep him on my chest for a couple of hours before they even took him to clean him off and tag him. Then I got him back for awhile. Then Rob went with him to get him checked out and weighed and everything and they got me ready and transferred into my recovery room. It was awful being separated from him, even though I knew he was with Rob.
When Rob walked into the recovery room without Holden, I about FREAKED OUT. His sugar was low, so they had to watch him for a few minutes. Apparently this is a common problem with smaller babies, and he was only 5lb 9oz and 17.5 inches long. Of course I freaked out the whole time, but they brought him back soon.
It was so awesome, and a little bit bizarre. This tiny person had been inside of me for almost 9 months! And I know everyone tells you this, but you just don't understand until it happens to you: the moment I pushed him out, I wasn't the same person. Life was changed forever, and for the better.
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